Posts

Showing posts from December, 2014

So...so lost

I love A-levels. Everything is in a textbook, there is a clear specification, what you need to know is laid out and all you have to do is read it enough times to understand it and memorise it. Then there's the fact hardly any of it is MCQ. You are graded on what you understand about a concept and what you write. Sure, it has it's faults - every examination system does, but I felt like it was fair. Or did I? Am I looking back with my rose tinted glasses firmly pushed up on my nose?

My point is, I'm so lost this time around. It's been 2 years since I had January exams, that familiar unease and daunting dread preventing you from really enjoying any christmas break. That's not the bit I mind, I love learning, I love revising and I love feeling like I am making progress with something. That's the problem this time: I have no idea how much progress I'm making, if I'm even making any progress at all.

The formative exams we're given to "give us an idea…

Tis' the season to be...dying of exam stress falalalala

It's December all ready!

I say that like this term has gone quickly... I guess it has as a whole but actually because I've done and felt so much, it really doesn't feel like it. It feels like a year of my life has been crammed into 10 weeks? The passing of time is so weird at university. It's a bit like waiting for your school day to end so you can go home, except it never ends...

A couple of things to mention:

1. About a month ago I hit a really hard place full of insecurity, self doubt and wallowing. Somewhere I knew it would get better because if there's anything I've learnt over my 19 years it's that it always gets better but I struggled to see that at the time. Now here I am, far more sure of myself, happy to be here and I already know, this is my time, yeah it's on (to quote Drake himself)

2. You have to keep making an effort. It's easy to get to uni, think you've made it and ask why aren't all the good things coming to you? You have t…